There is a book by Thomas Erikson with a title that I think resonates with almost every frustrated engineer: Surrounded by idiots

We have all been there. You are in a meeting, explaining a technical risk, and the person across from you is glazing over, tapping their pen, and asking, “But when can we release?”

You leave thinking, “They just don’t get it.” They leave thinking, “They’re dragging their feet.”

Neither of you is wrong. You are just communicating differently.

What started as a training session for my team had such a positive response and the desire for their colleagues to share their learnings was so great, that I had to take it further. So began the drive to bring the whole company on this journey through targeted team-based workshops.

The “Translation Layer” Bug

I originally ran this session just for my direct reports. We looked at the four communication styles:

  • Red: Be brief, be bright, be gone. Focus on results.
  • Blue: Give me the details, the data, and the risk assessment.
  • Green: Let’s ensure everyone is comfortable and the process is safe.
  • Yellow: Let’s talk about the big picture and the exciting future!

A quick caveat: We are complex humans, not primary colours. In reality, nobody “is” a colour. We all have a mix of these energies, and our preferences often shift depending on the context. But for the sake of readability in this post, I will be using the shorthand when describing individuals.

As we mapped ourselves against the model, the lightbulbs started turning on. Suddenly, previous conflicts weren’t seen as “personality clashes”, they were seen as data errors.

One of my Quality Engineers (a high “Blue” who loves detail) realised why they constantly clashed with a Software Engineer (a high “Red” who wants speed). The Quality Engineer wasn’t being difficult; they were being thorough. The Software Engineer wasn’t being reckless; they didn’t want all the detail of ‘why’, they just needed the ‘what’.

From “My Team” to the Whole Business

The best indicator of a successful initiative is when your team asks for more.

After the session, the team came to me and effectively said: “This was great, but it’s useless if only we know it. We need the people we work with to take this training so they understand us.”

They were right. Improving communication within a silo is easy. Improving communication between silos is where the real value lies.

So, we didn’t keep it to ourselves. We started by inviting the Software Engineers, Data, and Product to join the fun. But then we went further. We rolled it out to the entire business.

We got Commercial, Customer Support, Marketing, and even the Senior Leadership Team involved. All of these departments interact, and all of them would benefit from having that shared understanding.

And the feedback from the business? They loved it. In fact, the overarching feedback was that they want to do more training like this. Training that continues to build shared company-wide understanding and language that helps us all collaborate better.

The ROI of Empathy

Why does a Head of Quality care about personality tests? Because misunderstanding creates friction, and friction slows down delivery.

When an Engineer understands that their Sales Colleague is a “Yellow,” they know not to jump straight to business, but to share some social pleasantries first. When the CEO understands their Head of Support is “Green,” they know to approach change management with care, demonstrating they have considered the human impact before demanding the result.

The result isn’t just “nicer” meetings. It is faster decisions, fewer misunderstandings, and a shared language that spans the entire org chart.

Communication is the hardest technical problem you will ever solve. I think we’ve made a good start.

Summary

If you, or your team, feel like you are surrounded by idiots, there is a good chance you are simply surrounded by people who process information differently than you do.

At scale, that misunderstanding becomes friction, and friction is one of the most expensive forms of waste in an organisation.

As leaders, our job is to act as the translation layer between disciplines. By investing in a shared communication language across engineering, product, commercial, and leadership, we reduce noise, accelerate decision-making, and build systems that allow good people to move faster together.

Further reading

If you enjoyed this post then be sure to check out my other posts on Engineering Leadership.

Join the flock

Subscribe to get the latest posts on the messy reality of software delivery sent directly to your mailbox. I regularly share new thoughts on leadership and strategy —zero spam, just value.

Learn more

If you’d like to learn more about the DISC model, I highly recommend reading Surrounded by Idiots. You can get your copy, and support this website by buying it on Amazon through this link. Purchasing through that link may earn me a small commission from Amazon, at no additional cost to you.